Still hoping, praying, wishing, trying

Still trying to adopt! Share our page, y'all! We can't do it without you!

It's empty in the valley of your heart

I'm listening to Mumford and Sons and mourning plans A, B, and C a little. They were good plans, we thought. What happened? Why did they not work out? We don't know. But I can see the paths and life we expected with each plan, and I can't help but feel a bit sad that Plan D hasn't taken us there. Plan D is (we hope) going to take us to equally grand views and still waters ... just different views, different waters.

"If only, if only," the woodpecker sighed...


Well, we can't do anything about the "If only"s. We can only move forward, one step at a time. "Keep on keepin' on," my mom used to say. And so we shall.

"The ghosts that we knew will flicker from view and we'll live a long life."

Restless

I've had so much going through my brain...too many thoughts screaming too loudly for attention all at the same time. I can't keep myself from thinking, planning, worrying, wondering. Only way I've found to slow my whirling thoughts is to listen to music (of course). Today, I've been through childhood favorites:

Stuff to dance to (or watch Lizzie dance to):

More childhood favorites:

And music that defines the aching in my soul:

Luckily, my kids are used to any and all of my music tendencies. I hope they're being exposed to a wide variety of music, like I was. Even more, I hope they learn it's okay to take some time to reflect, to sort through your thoughts and emotions, to worry and wonder ... and still come out the other side, whole and well and ready for the journey ahead.

Life is a winding road

Looking at yesterday's post, I realize it may convey that I'm super depressed or something. I'm not. We are just at one of those forks in the road. As the scripture says, "Be still and know I am God." I'm trying very hard to be still and breathe...and listen to God. I'm not exactly sure where this new path will take us and we're at that point in journey where everything is unknown and you don't know what's around the bend...but you're pretty excited to find out!

I've decided to go back to school and change my professional field. If all goes well, I'll be starting classes in April (cross your fingers that I get into my program!) and heading off into a new career come summer. WOW! It is scary and exciting and entirely uncharted territory. Andy and I feel confident that this will be a good change for our family, but you just never know what kind of storms you'll encounter along the way, you know?

Maybe I should be HOPING for storms?

I am reminding myself, while I'm breathing and trying to be still (so, so hard for me!) that life is about learning to dance in the rain, finding joy in the journey. And, at some point, you reach a point where you've thought and prayed and done everything you can, and all that's left is to breathe, like the song says. All you can do is keep breathing. We are trying to be thoughtful, prayerful, and wise in this new venture so your added prayers (cuz you don't pray for us enough, right?) are deeply appreciated.

And here's something...just for fun...